Fear is not my friend. Somewhere along the line that enemy of an emotion, I’m sure serves some purpose. But, I for one do not seek it out on purpose and I can’t understand why anyone would want to. I will be the last person you’ll find watching a scary movie. I’m the girl who thought Charley and the Chocolate Factory and The Wizard of Oz were scary. I can count on my hand the number of actual “scary” movies I’ve seen in my life – none by actual choice.
I saw Halloween (you may have heard of it) in grade school at a girlfriend’s slumber party. I was afraid to be the only one that was too big of a “baby” not to watch. Unfortunately for me my vivid imagination replayed scenes from the movie preventing me from restful sleep for months (just ask my mother!) Poltergeist and Nightmare on Elm Street were two more peer-pressured movies I witnessed. Both led to more sleepless nights, where I humbly admit I pressured my younger sister into sleeping with me. What I thought she would do if we were actually attacked by Michael Myers or Freddie Krueger or that crazy clown under the bed, I don’t know. But I felt better having her there.
These days my fears are less about being stalked, haunted or murdered (although maybe they should be given the news on any given day), but more about the kind of fear that keeps me from being the best that I can be. The fear of not being good enough. The fear of not being liked. The fear of conflict. The fear of not moving forward. The fear of hurting someone’s feelings. The fear of failing my children. The fear of my dreams never coming true and the fear that they might actually come true and then what?
I hate that stomach-churning, sweat-beading feeling I get when I face something I don’t want to do. When it comes to fight or flight, my brain tells me to run as fast as I can and not look back. Yet deep down I know there is a time to fight and push that fear way forever. I find that courage more and more as I gradually venture outside my comfort zone. To pursue my dreams and not be afraid to be the woman I’m meant to be. To open my eyes going down the biggest hill on the roller coaster and see the track before me. To eat in a hotel restaurant alone instead of ordering room service. That’s they only way I’m going to be able to look at the fear reflected in my daughters’ eyes when they can’t sleep at night or are fearful that something they touched might make them sick. I want to tell them everything is going to be OK, and mean it. I want them to know it’s OK to fail and it’s OK to be afraid, but its not OK to let either stop them from their dreams.
What are you afraid of? Would you go to a scary movie on purpose?
- smile at fear (justdharmaquotes.wordpress.com)
- Love of Fear (functionofarubberduck.wordpress.com)
10 thoughts on “Fear is…Frightening”
I am far too sensitive to watch scary or disturbing movies. As soon as I hear the sounds of a person in distress my PTSD kicks in and yeah..its not good. My daughter on the other hand, loves them. We call her a freak 😛
I know what mean. My sister and Dad loved them too. I remember having to tell them to turn the TV down because I could hear the scray music.
I’m wired the same way. Even when my brain knows there’s nothing to fear, my body disagrees!
Jenny at Choice City Native
That exactly how I am. I try to tell myself its not real, but my heart keeps racing.
I like scary movies but not because I find them frightening. I think they’re funny. There are some exceptions. Three come to mind: The Shining, The Ring and Case 39. I’m actually not scared of anything, not since I conquered my fear of dragonflies. :O
I will definitely put those three on my do not watch list:) I think dragon flies are kind of creepy myself. While I’m not terrified of them, I really wouldn’t want one to land on me!
Interestingly you and I picked the same topic for the “F” post but approached it from different perspectives. I very much liked your take on the fear that people put themselves through. Being a guy, I’ve always taken grief about my squeamish nature when it comes to horror and gore. I’ve always been more interested in what makes people happy. Nice writing. As a brand new blogger, I’m learning a lot from folks like you. Never blogged before this challenge started six days ago. Peace.
Thanks for the comments. I liked your take on Fear too. I really liked the quote about what other people think about you is their business. For me that so hard to remember. Good luck with you blogging!
When I was young I read every scary book imaginable, watched everything I could that scared my socks off, loved Friday the 13th, Nightmare on Elm Street, all Vampire movies, and tried to scare people as often as possible. Then I read something from a well known book called The Bible, it said fear has torment, God told Joshua over and over again, “Do not Fear”, I read if God is on my side of who shall I be afraid?. I read God has not given me a spirit of fear but of power, love, and a sound mind. I began thinking about my dad. All my life my dad was afraid of lightening, going out on big bodies of water on a boat, etc.. These all related to fears he developed from some bad experiences he had when he was young. He grew up during the depression years so he was always afraid he would be broke. As a result of his fear he has been tormented most of his life, terrified of any thunderstorms, refuses to go out on a boat and was always afraid to take chances with his money and career so he has settled for a lot less in life. I started to realize fear does have torment, it does paralyze. I would much rather have love, power, and a sound mind so I can face anything that comes my way. So I said goodbye to fear and scary movies a long time ago. If I do watch one because I am forced, I recognize it for what it is, acting. I usually make fun of the characters or talk about the behind the scenes details of the making of a particular scene. This is usually enough for people to not invite me to watch anymore scary movies with them. The last time I had to watch “The Fly” with a group of teenagers I laughed so much they thought I was nuts. I just look at scary pictures in a completely different light now. I am no longer afraid. Those things aren’t real and they can not hurt me. My mind is focused on much more positive things these days. I truly believe we will become what ever we are listening to and watching with our eyes the most. If we put in fear, we will produce fear. If we put in confidence and faith, and belief that we will succeed, we have those results. You are on the right track!
Thanks for your insights. Very well said. I don’t think I’ll be dragged to any scary movies anytime soon. Neither of my daughters like them either. My oldest made us leave in the middle of Despereaux because it got too scary. I like the idea of laughing though them though. When I’m afraid I need to remember Joshua. Thanks for the reminder!